10 Reasons Why Russell Wilson is the Whitest Black Guy We Know


Racial stereotypes can often times be a slippery slope. The rest of the time they’re so goddamn funny, sensitivity takes a back seat. In years past, Tiger Woods was considered by many to “not be black enough” (whatever that means) and not represent his African American heritage to the fullest. So, in time, he broke the mold and showed everyone he’s human just like everyone else.

Russell Wilson has certainly grabbed the title from Tiger and honors his complete abandonment of all African American stereotypes like a boss. Here are ten reasons why “Tiger Woods Syndrome” should now be known as “Russell Wilson Syndrome”.

10 Reasons Why Russell Wilson is the Whitest Black Guy We Know

1.) He enjoys parsnips as a side dish.

2.) He loves pleated Dockers

3.) He surprised his wife with front row Darius Rucker concert tickets

4.) He purchased every available policy his insurance agent could offer him.

5.) Russell Wilson’s favorite guilty pleasure is Funnel Cakes

6.) He drinks Fresca

7.) He gets his hair cut at MasterCuts and is one punch card punch away from a free haircut

8.) He takes his family for Fro-Yo at least once a week

9.) He loves Estate Sales

10.) Russell Wilson’s favorite show is Duck Dynasty